One Spear | Video

[challengeaccepted]

[Watch that's a cell phone? Easy. The video function? Now that's pretty cool.

Some redheaded girl with an eyepatch and her hair pulled way back into a ponytail comes into view; she doesn't bother to figure out who this actually calls; right now is a time for absolutely indignant screaming at whoever the hell will listen.]

Okay, first of all! Your cell phones suck!

[Undyne, your priorities.]

Second of all, who the hell is responsible for this?

[She gestures to all of herself before realizing that might just mean jack and squat; her next act is to set down the weird cell phone, pick up her Totodile, and show it to everyone.]

This girl here? She's adorable! She's scaly and blue and looks like the monster she should be. Good for you, kid! And who puts monsters in little red balls in the first place? What kind of sick individuals are you?

[But that's beyond the point, and she quickly sets her down.]

I like being blue and scaly, you know! It's a good look on me! So what gives?

[...Hello to you too, Undyne.]

Comments

[ratingspoint]

[Wh...]

I'm not even-

[...]

...Well-spotted, Undyne! It's affected all of us here - and now I can finally say "all of us", because I got here before Papyrus did, and we both got here several weeks before you.

[god help us apparently he's going to react to your presence by giving you massive amounts of shit because of course he is]

So you're a bit delayed, but don't worry - your enthusiasm more than makes up for it!

[challengeaccepted]

[God this is why she doesn't like you-]

...I just got done running to Papyrus' house. He wasn't gone for two seconds, let alone several weeks!

[Is this some other weird you're human thing, what the hell.]

[ratingspoint]

[...Hm.]

And what was the human doing, while you were off doing that? I'm asking for a reason, I promise! Maybe I'll even tell you what that reason is once you've told me.

[challengeaccepted]

They were headed over to Hotland, so they're gonna hit up Alphys' lab any minute!

[...And probably run into you, now that she thinks of it. Oh god.






Well, surely Alphys has everything under control!

Maybe.]

1/3

[ratingspoint]

[Oh. Well, whatever he was expecting, it doesn't seem to have been that; his face does something weird for a second, his expression darkening a bit because damn, literally nothing can be easy in this place, can it.]

Well. That's-

[ratingspoint]

[...waaaaaaaaaaaaaaait

that means she hasn't seen the broadcast, doesn't it, she doesn't know about the- ]

[ratingspoint]

[FUCK TIMELINE SHENANIGANS THIS IS EXCELLENT NEVER MIND WE'RE GOOD]

...That's exactly what I thought! I've actually met the human myself, you know, they made it just fine to the labs. I was there...assisting Alphys with something.

1/2

[challengeaccepted]

Oh, you did, did you?

[challengeaccepted]

You mess with that human and I'll leave you under a boulder.

[ratingspoint]

Oooh - just as feisty as ever, I see! Well, you can do what you want, sweetheart, but you and I both know how upset trying something like that would make Dr. Alphys, don't we?

[...Mettaton, did you just.]

[challengeaccepted]

[...Did you just "but I'll tell mom" at her.

This is why she doesn't like you.]

That's pretty low. I can almost respect that.

[Too bad you suck!!]

[ratingspoint]

[...Darling, we're talking about him, not you...]

I could have gone lower and said that it was your job to capture the human in the first place. Fortunately for you, my dislike for cheap things extends to insults.

[Which is exactly why he said it anyway.]

[challengeaccepted]

The human beat me fair and square! I can respect that.

[...You hear that sound, in the distance? That's not the wind blowing.

That's the blow to Undyne's pride. But she tries to roll right through it.]

They'll get to Asgore and deal with things peacefully. Those two are a lot alike.

[She's put her hope in that kid, and the only thing she can do is believe.]

[ratingspoint]

Please. They're nothing alike and you know it.

[Because, you know. Last time he checked the fucking human didn't want to engage in all-out goddamn war against humanity and kill the shit out of everyone?

BUT THAT'S JUST WHAT HE GATHERED.]

[challengeaccepted]

They... Ah, there's no point in explaining it to you.

[She's not opening up to this guy for more cheap shots.]

[ratingspoint]

[Good. Excellent. Now literally all he has to do is just leave it alone and- ]

Oh, come on, darling. You can't just throw a hook like that out there with no indication of where it was going.

[...And of course he's not going to leave it the hell alone, because that would be smart. But for what it's worth, it doesn't sound like he's going to slam her with something hideous the second she opens her mouth, either, so at least there's that much effort being put forth.]

[challengeaccepted]

It's personal, nerd! Butt out!

[You must achieve a higher social link with the fish lady to unlock this story.]

[ratingspoint]

[...Uh.]

You know, of all things you could have possibly called me, "nerd" is probably the least appropriate?

[#priorities]

[challengeaccepted]

You have your face on a steak. You're totally a nerd!

[...There are different words for this than nerd, but here we are.]

[ratingspoint]

[...Did you just "your face is a steak, your argument is irrelevant" at him.

Well, it gets him to laugh, anyway, even if that probably wasn't the intended effect.]

It sells, doesn't it? And that's what matters.

[because to quote the immortal words of...ja rule or somebody, probably - holla holla get $$$]

[challengeaccepted]

I still don't get why anyone buys any of your stuff, but whatever.

[Guess everyone else is really into watching people get murdered.]

[ratingspoint]

Maybe "strangely aggressive one-eyed fish who likes war" is just an incredibly niche market that I don't happen to be hitting. How should I know?

[mettaton why have you decided to be everything that you are right now-]

I mean, the alternative is that their taste is just better than yours.

[challengeaccepted]

This aggressive one-eyed fish doesn't have a taste for watching monsters be murdered on television!

[Undyne, can we not-]

If that means I have bad taste, I never want good taste.

[ratingspoint]

Oh, will you get over it?

[Mettaton, no-]

It's not as though you're opposed to wholesale slaughter anyway.

[This is a thing we're doing. Undyne has been in Johto for like twenty minutes and this is an argument we're having.]

[challengeaccepted]

I'm not just going to get over the way my people have been wronged! That our people have been wronged! And neither should you!

We're not just going to waltz out of the barrier and into a bucket of sunshine and rainbows.

[Actually you're going to do exactly that-]